Archive for September, 2006

Make sure it’s worth it!

Whatever you do, for whatever reason, make sure it is worth it. Don’t ever do anything just to do it if it takes valuable time from you and yours. Get Real! People will always allow you to give of yourself until the giving is gone. And if you have no real reason to do it you will soon find out that you’re left with nothing but lost time and energy. People come and people go. When you’re around you’ll be utilized for what you can be, and if and when you’re gone it’ll be NEXT!!!!! Face it, they will get over you, and someone will take your place. When it’s good they’ll look for more, when it’s bad they’ll say you’re not doing what you said you would! Bottom line is, if it’s not meaningfull and worth trading the priceless and irreplaceable time you have.
REMEMBER, you will never get the time you’ve spent back…..EVER!!!!

Just a thought for ya.

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.

Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives,practical words,

to practical people, from a practical guy!

“Break the Rules & Live Like you should” – Part 2

Rule 3: Believing is Seeing: 

        This rule suggests that the proof of something being reality and of real substance is at the point  you can actually see it, touch it, taste it or smell it. This idea is somewhat limiting in that there will be many things that will never manifest or come into your life physically on their own, but will require some intervention by yourself. Much of what we do and the motivation to do it stems from what we feel or see. So it is a circular problem we have here. We can’t desire it because we don’t see it, and so we don’t pursue it. And we can’t have it if we don’t pursue it. Therefore this is definitely a rule worth looking into and preparing our minds to break at the roots. This one requires a new attitude and perspective on pursuits and goals.           

            The most important things that will come into our lives will be those birthed out of a heart centered soul driven march towards it without reservation as to whether we can have it or not. Our friends, lover, spirituality, education, careers, business, and joys were sought after relentlessly despite the possibility of rejection. We thought about it, daydreamed, envisioned them, and started towards their direction. Considering having a vision, this rule’s wording does have some merit in that there is a level of sight in play here, but it is not the sight that occurs with our natural pupils. It is an inner view that peers into the unknown and unseen things of life and allows us to grab hold of an intangible thing. It make the impossible possible and the infallible believable. Vision in the heart and soul causes us to move pass what we see in front of us naturally, and push towards what we believe is ahead of us spiritually and emotionally. A better word for this is the “F” word we hear so often and use so much. Faith is indeed the reality to the unreal, and the fullness of an empty today. Because we are completely limited physically to living in the present, in order to lay hold of anything beyond today, it must be captured through breaking the rule set by this social body and laying hold to a new law whereby you can envision a thing, and cause every member of your body to move towards it. It will happen, it will come, it shall be done, and it is so!           

            The gift of faith comes from God. It is the assurance in the Almighty One to deliver, and to perform. It is the guarantee that He is faithful to His word, and that if he has birthed a thing in you, you can walk as though it has already been manifested in you. Cash the check because it never bounces. After all, he’s the banker too!

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.Practical Personal DevelopmentPractical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!

“Everlasting Blessings are Worth the Wait”

               Contentment is great gain. If you are not careful you can place yourself in a position where you are begging your needs after having paid for your wants. At this point you’ve got a case of your pride not allowing you to admit your mistake, and further placing you in the path of ruin. All of this could be avoided if you’d learn to have godly contentment. It is knowing and believing that what God has for you is for you, and that He has no trouble making sure you get what is for you. So many people I’ve come across, both young and of age, including myself at times, have fallen into the trap of not being content with such things they have and begin to pursue everything that crosses their eye. In effect here are the things that have destroyed men throughout the beginning of time. These are the Lust of the flesh, the lust of the eye, and the pride of life. In essence it is the uncontrolled urging of the carnal man to obtain more than he has, and can handle at the time he desires it. There is no waiting, there is no praying, there is no trusting, and there is no peace. A characteristic that travels alongside this mind set is fear. Fear because the man believes that what he has is not sufficient enough to sustain him tomorrow. Although he has no clue of tomorrow, he spends his time worrying, toiling, and gathering more, and more stuff.

                 There is always a need to step back and take a look at every situation and desire to see if it is a beneficial one at the time. Even before this though, if you take the time to seek the face of the all wise all knowing God and His will, it is amazing how so much clarity is discovered in his presence. It is not that you will be told no all the time, but what happens is, in his presence there is fullness of joy, and so the voided space you were seeking to be filled up by the created thing or being will be filled by the creator of it all. Then you will see your desires in the proper light. You will find there is much more to enjoy when there is time spent reflecting on God’s provision and o prosper you in His way.

                  The promise has been already made for provision and prosperity, but the time for delivery of the gift may take a bit to arrive, nevertheless God’ s promises are yeah, and Amen. There is no need to doubt the faithful and longsuffering God. So take your eyes off of others, their stuff, and their status. You are as important to God as they are, and fit for an enjoyable life. Get ready to wait and be careful for nothing. Let your request be made known, and enjoy the time it takes to get to you. God is not a man that he should lie. His word has been spoken, and shall come to pass.

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.

Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!

Best Setting for Communicating!

                       We live in a world full of many differences and a plethora of diversity. Within our own families we inhabit space with people who, although we share similarities with, are very different in a multitude of ways. In general we are separated by geographical locations, culture, religion, talents, skills, education, career, nurturing, race, gender, physical appearance, and economics to be broad. These are just a few of the diversities in our world. In light of theses differences, we must remember that opinions, desires, thoughts, attitudes, hopes, visions, and goals, will all be different for each individual. There will never be an identical person with the same everything as you. Even though there might be commonalities, there will always be differences amongst you.              A challenge that is often faced in social arenas and personal relationships is the tendency to force another individual to conform to the ideology of ourselves. What I mean by this is many people attempt to return responses to an associate, friend, family member, or spouse in a way that might cause the other to change there dialogue to fit the situation for your benefit and pleasing. This is what I consider a controlled environment. It is one in which all responses and communication are less than genuine from it’s participants, and does not allow for anyone present to express their honest feelings and opinions, for fear of rejection, displeasure, or conflict. It also is contrived of a dialogue that is not relative to what are the prevailing issues for the circumstance and situation. The converse of this is what I consider a free and natural environment, or one in which what you speak and what is being spoken to you is genuine and honest as well as direct and relative to the situation or circumstance. You clearly hear what is coming from the true opinion of the heart and, have substance to digest that it is relative to the matter at hand.

                In any relationship it is vitally important to stay relevant. The relevancy of your dialogue allows you to feed another person and help them to know you better. Many a couple express their desire to know each other more or they say that their spouse or friend make mental notes of their personality traits, feelings, likes & dislikes. The only real way of discovering such truth is to provide for a free and natural environment from which to gather the valuable data. A man often has a problem sharing his real feelings with a woman for fear that he might say the wrong thing. With his visual and practical approach, he often times states what is clearly and simply seen by all, but is obviously perceived completely different by the woman. His approach is often received as blunt, too direct, insensitive, harsh, thoughtless, selfish, and impersonal. The woman however can, generally speaking, attempt to share her thoughts through her subtle activity, sarcastic phrasing, inquiring indirect questions, and emotional displays. Her approach is often perceived by the man as indirect, confusing, misleading, and provoking.

                Because gender is only one difference, can you imagine the other multitude of issues that can arise out of the communication attempts of people all over? If I use my differences to persuade you to change your response, I have in fact changes the results of our dialogue, which changes and pollutes the information being returned. Therefore, although I believe I know you, I realize I am not really hearing your thoughts but my own spoken through you. Later on when I witness a different behavior or hear a different idea spoken, I am confused, upset, or questioning of the source of such change. What I have missed is the fact that I have been a contributor to this event, because I have not allowed the interaction between us to develop in a free and natural environment. You say you want that person to understand you more and do those things you like. You believe you know all about them and make attempts to please them to no avail. Maybe you have been developing your relationship in a controlled environment. It is a difficult thing sometime to open up and not allow yourself to dictate what the proper response to your questions will be.

               My remedy is to get your feelings off your shoulder. Stop being selfish and dictating all of the dialogue; Give yourself the opportunity to listen sometime. Stop talking and reciting what you have read. When your advice is needed it will be requested, trust me. Listening is really, really, really important. You can definitely have a great life if you learn to listen with your eyes, ears, and mouth. Don’t look away, don’t be distracted, and don’t always respond. Stay, listen & learn, and you’ll find out, you know very little and here’s your chance to know so much more!!!

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.

Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!

Here’s an excercise for a new begining:

Start by listing all the people in your life that have made any contribution to your growth whether they were sweet about it and meant you well or if they were nasty and mean and wanted you to fail. Write every name down, and how they have influenced what you do in life, where you are in life, and what you’ve learned through life. For the mean and nasty, write a general letter that says thank you for being the obstacle in my life that made me work harder, think different, go another way, move to another place, and just plain wake up. To the sweet and supportive, wirte one that says thank you for helping remember that I could be better, do better, live better, and think higher. Send it to yourself in the mail via snail mail, two letters, two envelopes, and then place them in a place unopened. Whenever you need to remind yourself of your worth and whether you’re headed in the right direction, just unseal the letters,open them up and read about where you’ve come from and what it took to get you here. It will remind you of the road past and strengthen you for the road ahead. Be blessed and encouraged. Know that everything you’ve faced is only making you for your greater tomorrow. DOn’t go past it, or over it, plw through and overcome it. You can, you will, you shall, you must, SURVIVE!!!!!!

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.

Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!

“Break the Rules & Live Like you should” – Part 1

        Isn’t it amazing that we spend a great portion of our lives living up to some particular standard or criteria set by someone else? We go to school and learn to obey the school rules, there are civil laws we must obey, and general respected and accepted rules of society. Some rules however are meant to be broken. There are natural rules that we have a habit of transferring into our spiritual lives and give them full reign to govern our mental, emotional & spiritual activity.  

Rule 1: Haven’t you heard of Gravity             

               One rule states that what goes up must come down. This rule in the spiritual realm causes many a man to fear growth and the challenges of advancement because we think it will be short lived and ultimately fail. Truth is we all have been given the chance to succeed and reach our greatest potential if we so desire and step forth to do so. This opportunity came when we broke through the birthing canal and came forth into this world from our mother’s womb. Isn’t it something that the people who remind you of this rule are often themselves either chosen not to grow, or are in a position or level that they themselves fear will end soon. Some rules were established out of complete fear of those of whom the rules & laws would be imposed upon. The institution of slavery was such an area where there were many rules created to prevent rebellion and to keep human beings from becoming all they could be spiritually, emotionally and mentally. You must take the position that I will prepare myself to succeed and plan for continual growth. There are always challenges and obstacle with any advancement, but it’s what makes it worthwhile. Your strength and fortitude are increased with every rung you climb. It takes strength to endure the climb, and if you move along, without skipping the treacherous steps it may include, you will be more than strong enough to not only survive, but to prosper. 

Rule 2: History always repeats itself                      

                    This rule basically tells us that situations and conflicts of the past will always be relived in present and future generations. It also speaks that there is nothing new under the sun and that if it has already happened it will destined to occur again, although with different characters and surroundings. In order for you to break this rule you believe that whatever it is, it has got to work in my favor or it can not come into my world at all. I’m speaking of things like family curses and bad habits that keep creeping up in your family and will not seem to die. Things like financial problems and lack of direction and motivation to succeed in anything are all examples of this rule. Maybe you can look back in your own family line and see traces of careless and frivolous living, and if you are not careful, you will adopt the rule and stop living with any purpose. A directionless past does not conclude that your future will be one full of hopeless wondering. You must change your future despite your past. Very day is a new day fresh from any sourness of a life ridden in guilt from mistakes and shortcomings. This breath and these thoughts are brand new. They are not borrowed from yesterday; you got new chances and new opportunities for greatness. Open up a book, meet a new person, try a new hobby, start a new career, open up a business, or try some new food. Change your mind and revive your soul, and leave the thoughts of yesterday where they lie. It’s a new season and a new day. 

More rules to Come! 

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr.

Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!         

5 Days & 5 minutes to better Organization – Day 2

                   Today it’s time to further discuss our need for getting organized. We must remember through out each and every day that getting and staying organized is all about changing the thought process, and giving ourselves new approaches for doing the same thing. As we become repetitive in certain positive systematic activities, they become brand new GOOD habits that will cause us to think less and do more. You know that one of the biggest problems you keep having is mental overload. You know you’ve got so much to get done, and you often know about it all well in advance of the time needed to get it done. The problem is, you never stop to create a plan of attack, in order to meet it head on. There is always the temptation to wait until the minimum amount of time you think you need to accomplish the project has arrived. For instance, if you analyze that it will take you no more than approximately 3 days to complete a project, there is a natural urge to wait until 3 days before the project is due until you even start the working on it in any way. And then uncle Murphy shows up with his t-shirt and billboard signs reminding us of how long his law has been in existence, and insisting that it always applies.

              Then it happens, not because we did not have any good ideas or were incapable of completing the project, but because we have closed the window of opportunity, and have left the doors closed to any flexibility for unexpected occurrences and phenomena. What you have done in fact is worked against your own self. You see your mind is definitely the most powerful computer around and is capable of processing information quickly, and retaining it for long lengths of time, and recalling it whenever needed. What it does need is the help of the rest of your body. Have you ever noticed that when you are anxious about something, you get a headache or feel nauseated, or even a pain in the pit of your stomach? That’s all because your body must support your brains demands for energy. You cut off your processing time, and ask your brain to work with little room for error or down time. The time you thought you needed is all you gave yourself, now you are forced to work in those confines. So the phone rings and you are slightly distracted. You get hungry and feel like you need to put something in your belly and  you’re distracted. The door bell rings and you’re distracted. Your head starts to hurt and you’re really distracted. You can’t find all of your tools, now you have no choice but to stop and deal with the issues. The clock is still spinning and you have cut yourself too close, with no time to spare. Now the idea that time is running out and that you may not finish is eating you up inside. Your head hurts, your belly aches, you’re sweating, and feeling nervous inside. If you couple this all with having other regular responsibilities, you’ve got yourself a master disaster waiting to erupt. Long story short, you finish (if you do) with an inferior project that in no way represents your best. You have to compromise quality for quantity just to make sure you have enough to meet the minimum requirements of the project. The awful truth about such a fiasco is that, you will tend to repeat this same behavior in other area of your life, if you don’t change your approach. That being said, let’s discover what we can do in order to make a new start in 5 days & 5 min.

          Here’s the idea, time is of the essence as they say. You need to start as early as possible. It may seem like its obvious & then again most of these ideas are. The problem is you’re not using them yet, so stay awhile. Whatever it is whenever it becomes apparent that you need to do it, start to break down the various components of what it will take to get it completed. This activity is done long before you ever start anything physically. You might call it brainstorming, pondering, meditating, or just plain thinking. What it does is puts your body in motion towards completing the project at hand well before it’s needed. If you get the project in class, start brainstorming, if it comes to you at work, start thinking, if you’re in the car or at the store, let your mind take the time to start flushing out ideas on getting it done. Here’s the thing though, don’t sweat the small stuff. Think about the big picture at this time only. You’ll get to the details later. You’re trying to build the concept.  You’ll find every time that the details always come together in the end. 

         The final most important thing you need to remember to accomplish this is to never get stuck on any idea. If it does work throw it out, or edit it, until it does. What you’ve created for yourself is a gap of time that will allow you to think clearer, breathe freely, and allow your mind to do what it was created to do. When using this technique you must approach each project   according to the time that has been given to you. You may not have a week, or 3 days, maybe it must be turned in tomorrow. Whatever time you have, start when it’s given to think, and you’ll be glad you did. Think about it before you start. Let the ideas flow freely. Throw out what doesn’t seem clear and edit what needs work. Clean it up and finish it. You’re done now and you’re not stressed. Now you can sleep peacefully and meet back for DAY 3. See you then! Happy Organizing. 

Copyright © 2006 Kenneth Martin, Jr. Practical Personal Development

Practical wisdom, for practical lives, practical words, to practical people, from a practical guy!



September 2006